- I will eat less and exercise more. Too many nights on the couch, too many treats and too little time spent running around the park, has made me flufflier and well, a little rounder. I don't think using that old excuse "I'm just big boned" works anymore.
- I will resolve to beg less.
Ive got begging down to a fine art - they are putty in my paws but, let's face it, begging is a very demeaning habit. From now on, I shall only beg for worthwhile things such as a pizzle ( eeuw! don't ask) or a pig's ear.
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I will recognize the difference between trees, lamp posts and furniture.
I promise not to treat the walls and furniture in the house in the same way as I do trees and lamp posts.
- I won't bite the vet anymore.
I know that vets and their staff are just trying to help in their own inscrutable way, but it irritates me when they know how to push my buttons by sticking things into my backside and yanking open my mouth.
- I won't steal food.
They make it so easy by leaving food on tables and work surfaces but I will definitely resist the temptation.
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I will introduce myself to guests in a more appropriate way.
In other words, I will focus above the waist, not below when greeting guests. My owner's tell me that my doggy greeting invades people's space.
- I will try harder "holding it" until morning. If nature calls in the middle of the night, I will hold it until my routine early morning visit to the garden, unless special considerations apply. I will decide what those considerations are.
- I will not bark so much at delivery men, the postie and the meter readers. Even though it scares the living daylights out of them and makes some of them leave packages in the middle of the path. My self esteem gets such a boost when I see them run out of the gate.
- I will restrain myself from chasing joggers and cyclists in the park. In my book, anything that runs so fast is fair game. I am, after all, programmed to chase anything that moves so why not. This one is a puzzle to me as I am allowed to chase intruders but not these things.
- I will be more tolerant of those home made flea bandanas and awful jackets. Obviously my dear owner has spent a lot of money buying me such things. I will just have to put up with the sniggers and taunts of the other dogs that I meet.
- I will learn to drink properly from the water dish.
Slurping from the water dish is very satisfying but it drives my owners mad when I dribble a trail of water across the floor.
- I will respect my owner's desire to be in charge. I will stop trying to train them to do what I want. My superior abilities make it so easy to be in charge. Its hard to think that an inferior mind thinks they are training me.
- I will not chew shoes, furniture, books and anything else when left alone at home.
It wont happen if you give me a trip bone or a filled Kong toy to keep the boredom at bay.
- I promise I will not roll in fox poo, bird poo or anything else that you consider to be revolting. This is my primitive urges to hide my smell from hunters.
- I will not drink from muddy pools, although I don't know what the big deal is when I do drink the stuff. It fell from the sky didn't it?
- Here is a little clip of an esiotrot helping out another. It will have you cheering along with the audience. Who said they were dim creatures?
Until the next blog, have a good January and don't get too depressed about all those brown envelopes thudding onto the mat.
Dawn (".")
